Cold decks in the desert heat

Event 39 $1,500 NLHE - 20 June...Oh Jesus God no!

'Two pair no good, two pair no good' is my mantra, so unless I flop close to the absolute nuts, I am gonna sit tight and save my chips. That's the plan anyway. Well, the plan also is to get far more aggro pre-flop but I didn't really know that until I started playing - my head just kinda took over.

It must have been only the 7th or 8th hand of the day when, sitting in late position, I see a raise, a re-raise and a call in front of me. I have AK off. You know what? If I was playing online then I'm shoving with this. So why play any different here? No reason at all Hames. I shove. Head down and pray. Fold, fold, insta-call. Bollocks - I must have run into Aces, Kings or at worst / best QQ. Filled with dread I look over and am mightily relieved to see AK suited. No flush and we split the pot. OK, chill for a bit. Flop a couple of winners, take a few down and I'm up from a 4.5k starting stack to about 7K.

Then a raise and an all-in for some guy's last 2K. I have AQ suited in mid position. I'm thinking the range of Mr All-in is pretty wide so I decide to fight for this pot. "I'm all-in". The dude who raised ponders for a while, then folds. Phew. Against the all-in guy, I hit the nut flush on the river and say out loud, 'darn, I shoulda slow-played...' The guy who folds says 'great bet, if you'd slow played you woulda lost all your chips.' The board had paired and he would have hit the full house. Nice work Hamesy. I go into the break with about 9k.

Come back and get some nice-ish hands - a couple of pocket 9's, 10's and AJ. But I just flat call raises with these and bad flops take me off the hands. Before I know it I'm down to 7k and the blinds are already 100/200. I need to change gears and start controlling the pots. I feel like I'm being too passive. Any playable hands and I'm raising or re-raising. I need to take the initiative away from my opponents, put them on the back foot.

Q8 diamonds - that's playable in my book. I raise the limper in first position to a hefty 700 and get an insta-call to my left. Hmmmm, I dont like that. First position calls. Lets see the flop. K J 3 - all diamonds. Jackpot! Check to me - I check just hoping no diamond on the turn. Lady on my left checks. Turn is 7 spades. First position bets 1800. I flat call; so does she. Sweet. River is another blank. You beauty - I am gonna treble up. First position bets again with what I imagine is two pair. If I call I will have just a thousand left so I decide to flat call to let the third player in with a call rather than raise all-in and let her know she is beat. I ponder and make my oh-so-reluctant call with the second nuts. The plan works and she calls. YES! I have just trebled up....Oh, hang on a second....NO I F'IN HAVEN'T! I HAVE JUST LOST MOST OF MY FREAKIN' STACK COS DIP-STICK IN 1ST POSITION HAS A 5 OF DIAMONDS. NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

'Poker Gods, Poker Gods, why hast thou forsaken me?' The player opposite me looks over and says 'sick.' Yep, that's exactly how I feel. I went for the gamble and thought it had paid off supremely and now I am crippled.

I have a thousand left and the next hand it is folded to me and I shove all-in with QJ suited. Of course the small blind has AK and of course he hits his ace and of course I am knocked out and of course I should have folded the Q 8 pre-flop and of course I will replay this hand a thousand times and of course I will learn from it and of course it will make me a better player in the long run but of course right now I dont give a xxxx about that. I have two days to recover, get my poker house in order and come back stronger for the $2500 mixed Limit/No Limit on Wednesday. I am crap at Limit so I will probably win that one. SHIP. IT. Please.